FIFA Congress United by Human
Rights Violations and Comic Sans
JESSICA LI
As the workers in Brazil continue to devotedly work on
construction for this year’s World Cup, the FIFA Congress at JHUMUNC continues
to ardently disagree about what issues should be addressed. The session seemed
to start off well, with a unified vote to not discuss glaring human rights
violations in Brazil. However, after this initial moment of agreement, debate
turned scattered and incoherent as delegates proceeded to argue about which
problems were most important and which were most avoidable. Many potential
topics were brought up and shot down with dizzying speed, and progress halted
to a stop. All hope is not lost, though. By far the most productive action
taken during this first session was the near-unanimous vote to change the
Speaker’s List font from the traditional Times New Roman to the hip and swaggy
Comic Sans. This may be heralded as a sign that the members of FIFA Congress
are finally ready to embrace change and cooperation. Not all delegates are so
keen on moving forward, though. The delegate from Mexico expressed that
discussion still appeared to be going in circles, while the delegate from South
Africa encouraged his peers to “focus on what Brazil already has.” Indeed,
Brazil does have many valuable resources that other countries do not, which
could be used to their advantage in preparing for the games. One promising idea
was to enlist the powerful Brazilian drug cartels to assist in transporting and
directing tourists. This would certainly be more feasible than the ridiculous
proposal to develop an entire new fleet of buses for the same purpose, and this
type of resourceful thinking is exactly what FIFA needs in order to succeed. If
discussion continues in this direction, we may actually see the FIFA Congress
accomplish something.
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